brief encounter

I am feeling wistful today. What happens when life imitates fiction? Does that make you completely not-extraordinary or just pathetic?

I vote pathetic - but if I just had better style and could hang around in railway stations I think it would be much better. This week's theme seems to be relationships and sex. Do they go together? Do they matter?

Right now i'm looking for the once a week thing - but my colleague seems to enjoy the attach, attach, attach, run away, run away, run away. It's exhausting - I don't have that much energy.

I do like him a lot. I don't think it's very romantic. The sex is hot as hell but sometimes I need a hug. But it's not the brilliant mistake that he was. My stomach still does flip flops when he throws me into bed. I love to watch his body do anything. I've never been so sexually attracted to someone.

He's insane though. He blocks so much off for his 'safety'. It's just jerk-y. If he doesn't like it - it shouldn't exist. However, if he admires someone he will bend his rules. I need to fit into his world. The friends who he adores - he will go to another's house! He will eat their waffles!

It's good for me though. If I want something - I just do it without him.

But my god - that movie last night. I remember that. How can it still hurt?

these arms of mine

Starting to blog again seems to be a good idea.

In a moment of muddle with the imaginary friend. I can't save him and I can't convince him that I like him. Hopefully a long bike ride and the horrible white sox will bring things around. I just fear that I am trying to hold on to something he doesn't want. However, if you ever date a slightly autistic 35 year old man with relationship issues do not point out his foibles and your insecurities within a 10 minute arguement. The slightly autistic 35 year old man does not cope well.

So maybe he still likes me, maybe he doesn't. I suppose I'll find out tomorrow.